Thanks for posh biscuits, cassettes, cabbages and kings!

 It was such a huge pleasure to be asked to deliver the keynote at Barnsley’s early years and family start services Quality Improvement event this morning. I'm known in Barnsley I'm told... so a pleasure to return and a warm welcome was waiting. I was asked to talk about the long view, the way I understood it, the critical nature of early relationships in being happy. I decided to talk about the people that love you, and in doing so sow the seeds of self-belief, worth and aspiration. It was an ideal opportunity to share some memories of those that were there for me in the early years. Roger, M^lle Barrett, and George... three people who gave me courage, mind and heart. Even putting the slides together was emotional, it brought a sense of gratitude - tinged with loss..

Roger! Roger was most probably a progressive teacher in the early 70s. He insisted we called by his first name, and caught the girls out for going to the loo in pairs by hiding behind the classroom door!!  He rewarded children regularly for good learning by giving us biscuit - wrapped biscuits! Posh ones! My turn came and I hid behind my school bag to eat it. Most probably I thought he was just being nice, I didn't really deserve it. Anyhow, he told me off, "stand proud", he said, "you've earned it, you are good and you've worked hard". I have never forgotten!

M^elle Barrett was my maths teacher. Sadly, my attention to maths runs at a deficit! I've been known to appear blank. Counting really doesn't excite; after 5, I jump to loads, there's no meaning to it for me. Which is probably why I'm doing a PhD in finance and accountability!?  As the story goes, in school I'd always failed in maths - abysmally! That was until Miss B sat me next to her, and asked me to whisper the answers - I couldn't write, so no surprise I’d failed. To please her, I began to work hard. Along came the mid-term test, and my mum in her wisdom introduced the reward: a cassette [google that kids!] of my favourite comedian. A powerful combination of incentives, I aced the test, 18.5/20! I also used a payphone for the first time that day to claim my reward! The power of bribery and corruption!

Finally, George! My parents meet George and his wife while they were out walking their dog - theirs not ours. I'm not sure who heard who first, but as English speakers on a French street, what started as a shared fluency ended in political and philosophical conversation - fuelled by champagne! I soon became a willing learner, as George took me on Wednesday afternoons for English lessons. These grudgingly began with 5 minute dictation, shortly forgotten in favour of deep conversations about literature, philosophy and comparative religion. I remember we started with ‘The Walrus and The Carpenter’ ... and cabbages and kings!  However, after that I can't remember a word, but I still sense the excitement of discovery. I think George lost the battle on the book front, that necessary evil would come much later. But when I consider my values as a professional, practitioner and researcher, it's all there - solid foundations on which to build!  He told Mum I be an author, a dream that did come true. What foresight though, at a time I could not make a mark, and typewriters weighed 7 kilos. I wrote to him for years, from college, long letters typed on coloured paper. I had no idea how lucky I was, a young mind needing his gentle questioning. How ordinarily lucky: my first tutor an Oxford Don!

These three people didn't set out to change my life, I doubt they would have expected to be the subject of a conference keynote. I was a child that they loved enough to care. In doing so they taught me that I was braver, stronger and smarter than I believed. They could not remove the toxicity of the bigger world conversation; the grand narratives, that insidiously lead us too believe all is good in growth and money. A tension we all navigate, but one that adds to the vilification of those denied participation in society's activity. Schooling, employment, travel, housing... denied by shape or thought. They  taught me to be proud, strong and loving – a good antidote to despair and hopelessness in turbulent times. Apt this week in the face of breakdowns, and disturbing events across the pond.

Thank you Barnsley!!!!!!